…Lianhe Wanbao Interview…

Here is an interview I did last week with Lianhe Wanbao.

Many thanks to Lianhe Wanbao and Yuneng for setting up this interview!

Lianhe Wanbao Interview 240110

For those who missed out on the article, there is a summary of it here:

http://news.omy.sg/Showbiz/E-News/Story/OMYStory201001241630-122699.html

For those who do not understand Chinese, basically the interview was a simple write-up about me and my involvement with music. I sold my first song at age 17, however it was only 5 years later that I sold my next (which was lucky enough to be a hit). The article also highlighted how I felt back then and all the excitement and disappointment I faced along the way. The interview ended with my thoughts for people out there who wish to do music.

To add, I cannot help but further emphasise the need to have good discipline, proper conduct and maintaining integrity while in this biz. Without good discipline, we will lose focus of our goals. Without conduct, we degrade ourselves and pull others down. Without integrity, we lose the respect and trust of others as well as that of our own.

And to bind it all together, we need to exercise gratitude. We must always be thankful towards those people that have helped us along the way and practice generosity in return. We must NEVER forget them. Even when years have passed and today you are famous and successful, always remember that: we are just dots connected in a big picture. Every dot in the picture makes a difference on its look as a whole.

So where will you be today without that one (or more) dot(s)?

Dayvlight

…A Truly Purposeful Life…

I’d like to share this article with you.  May it shine light upon your life:

A truly purposeful life

The National University of Singapore Business School, in a recent survey, found that Singaporeans with university degrees or earn S$5000 or more a month are the happiest. Yet they are unhappy with their lot and enjoy life the least, compared to others who make less money.

This unhappiness, says the Straits Times editorial of the Sunday Times (17 January 2010) “could stem from their higher, unfulfilled expectations.”  The high-incomers probably define their happiness as having fine food, fancy cars and fabulous homes. But this kind of happiness is only physical and external and, as such, very limited.

These “successful” high-incomers are generally dissatisfied and unhappy probably because they keep measuring themselves against others. Other people may be perceived to be “happy,” but in reality they, too, have their own issues.

Moreover, happiness is not a regular event like one’s work, meals, or toilet, and one’s circumstances often change. The point is that we are unlikely to be really happy if we define our happiness by others’ standards; for, it is a form of emotional dependence.

Many thinking Buddhists would also say that happiness has to do with our purpose in life. But first, we need to understand what “purpose” here really means. If there is any purpose in life, I would say that it is to grow. Understandably, this does not mean merely growing old, ending in death, as this happens whether we wish it or not. A very important purpose of life, in fact, must be to grow up, that is, to grow spiritually.

To grow in the spirit is to understand at least two important things. First, it has to do with happiness, which for our present purpose can be said to be a feeling of interconnectedness with everyone (especially those we love) and with everything around us.

Secondly, growing spiritually means that we see the physical world and material things are only means to an end, and not ends in themselves. Money, for example, is what money buys. What we buy or keep should be guided by necessity and wisdom.

An effective way of living happily is to have a wholesome purpose-driven life. Such a purpose can be merely instrumental (such as working hard to be able to bring happiness to those we love) or intrinsic, that is, being passionate about what we believe in and do. An intrinsic purpose of life must be a wholesome one because we enjoy doing it for itself. Not only are we happy doing it, but it benefits others, too.

We can never be truly happy by ourselves while others around us suffer; that is, if we are really wholesome beings capable of being moved by goodness and compassion. In this sense, we can be happy by being devoted to something bigger than our self.

This sense of something bigger than our self is naturally something that transcends the notion of a personal self. We first need to understand or at least accept that any notion of self is merely a limiting construct, a wall to keep others out of our lives. We begin to break down this cold wall by doing something as simple as giving up a seat in a train to someone who needs it more, or something more difficult such as switching off our phones in a study class and giving our undivided attention and respect to another (the teacher or speaker), or something much bigger like doing beneficial social work.

For me that bigger-than-self task is the Sutta Discovery translation work which I always look forward to after my daily duties of parenting, teaching and counselling have been done. It is a joyful adventure I always look forward to. And then there is the joy of teaching these Suttas to a Dharma-moved audience. And to know that there are others who are studying or teaching these Suttas themselves. For, this is the on-going education of our Buddhist community for their happy future.

My wife Ratna enjoys working with our children’s school’s parents’ association, getting more parents, involved in their children’s education and the school itself. She is also a very compassionate and effective mentor of ex-inmates from the Boys’ and Girls’ Homes. She is simply happy to see her mentees grow and progress happily. In fact, she is so good that she has been commended by the Ministry of Community Development, Youth and Sports.

Yet, we all know that such happiness is the fleeting by-product of doing what we are good at, and enjoying it. We also know that this happiness is the fruit of a deeper happiness in the Buddha’s Teachings of emotional independence.

Emotional independence means that our view of success, our happiness, is not dependent on other’s praises, nor from financial gains, nor status and titles, nor fame. To be emotionally independent means to see our own inner joyful stillness, especially through the Buddha’s methods of mental cultivation.

The Buddha’s methods of mind-training bring us true happiness that is the profound peace and joy of the aloneness of our still mind. This spiritual aloneness not only dispels worldly loneliness (which arises through lack of inner peace), but also empowers us abandon our self-centredness, superstitions (dependence on succour from external sources), and self-doubt (that we can liberate ourselves from evil and suffering through our own efforts). This is fact is the first step on the path to awakening.

Piya Tan ©2010 100117
More info on Mr Piya Tan here:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Piya_Tan

http://dharmafarer.org/wordpress/

Dayvlight

…How To Use ATMs Effectively…

…As we all know, queuing up at ATMs can be frustrating at times. Especially during peak hours, at hot locations or simply at the start (or end) of each month (depending on your pay day). Here are some possible ideas I have thought about. If you have yours, please share!…

…1. Single Queue – At times, there could be various ATMs lined up next to each other. But having multiple queues for each individual ATM is not a good solution. Picture this: Imagine a person (let’s call him, “A”) is taking up a longer than usual time at the machine and holds up everyone in the queue. However, the queue for the ATM next to the one he is at is moving at a faster pace. Upon seeing this, the people in A’s queue get impatient and start blaming themselves, A and perhaps, the weather for it. Now imagine if it is a single queue, we may get even distribution. People DO NOT have to waste their time just because another user takes up more time.  Instead, everyone has a fair chance to use the next readily available machine…

…2. Put The Clock Away – Put anything that has a time display out of sight. We will only get more impatient when we start taking note of how much time we are spending in queue. Even 5 minutes may seem like forever…

…3. Be Prepared – Always take out the cards that you need to use for the transaction just BEFORE your turn. Taking them out earlier puts you at risk for suffering from impatience (“oei, quick leh! i’m ready!”). Taking them out when it is already YOUR turn makes you waste even more time and increases your chances of fumbling and dropping stuffs from your wallet all over the floor…

…4. Think Smart – If you are curious to know your bank balance after making a withdrawal, why not opt to print a receipt (for the eco-friendly: we can also use the receipt to make notes or as a bookmark)? It is time consuming to make a withdrawal *eject card* and to check our bank balance separately *insert card again*. Likewise, if the MRT station is just next door, why not head there to top your EZ Link card (POSB/DBS users) instead? The rest of us in the queue cannot make cash withdrawals from a Transitlink Booth. So think smart and be considerate…

…5. Do Not Hog – Once transaction is complete, kindly move away. I noticed how some people sort their wallets, check receipts and make phone calls at the machine after use. Totally ignoring the queue that is behind them…

Dayvlight

…Dealing With Difficult People…

A great talk on the subject of “dealing with difficult people”…

…What Triggers You?…

…Who pulls your trigger?…

…When we come into contact with something (or someone), we develop a certain form of reaction. This comes in the form of feelings that can be split into 3 categories: Positive, Negative or Neutral. I do not recommend that we embrace any of them because feelings, like all conditioned phenomena, are impermanent…

…When we develop positive feelings, we are afraid of losing them and hence we suffer. When we develop negative feelings, we dislike them and suffering ensues. When we develop neutral feelings, we become ignorant to the matter and we suffer too. The solution to this is to note that all feelings arise and pass away and we should not cling on to any of them. We should also note that suffering is part of life and we do not go about denying its existence. We only bring about greater pain if we go round running away from suffering but we may find peace and joy when we learn to understand its true nature…

…So when someone or something triggers our feelings today, are we reacting to it based on our past or present experience? I’d like to share the following excerpt from Ajahn Sumedho‘s book entitled The Mind and The Way:

“…When we look at objects and name them, we think we know them. We think we know this person or that person because we have a name or a memory of them. We think we know all kinds of things because we remember them. Our ability to know, sometimes, is of the conditioned sort – knowing about, rather than knowing directly…”

…Therefore a good practice is, when a feeling arises, we should note it either as a positive, negative or neutral feeling. Do not label them with names e.g. happy, angry or sad etc. Once we start noticing these emotions are simply “feelings”, our reaction towards that particular situation is kept in check. The next thing to do is to investigate. We may ask ourselves, “what is this feeling that I am experiencing now? Why am I feeling this way? What is the root of the problem?”. For people who are feeling angry, you will notice that your anger subsides each time u raise a question to your feelings. Once investigation is done, we note it and watch how it simply arises and passes away. Like all conditioned phenomena, they are impermanent…

…So what triggers you today? Is it really the person or object that is making you feel this way now? OR is it simply a creation of your own mind based on past conditioning?…

Dayvlight

…Insensitive…

…When people are insensitive to your needs, what do we do? When all your so-called “friends” have hopped on the next train bound for the Land of Gold and you are left behind, what do you do? When people do not reciprocate your goodness and do not count you in for good times, how should we feel?…

…Does anyone even care anymore?…

…Maybe it is because I have always kept to myself. Maybe it is because you think I am strong. Maybe it is because you have never considered me as your…

…Simply put, we are selfish creatures to the extent that we do not take any notice of it and so often, we hurt others despite not having any intentions to…

…But I shall move on. I shall channel all negative energy into positive ones. I shall learn from these experiences so that I can protect myself in future. I shall let you know some day what it means to be grateful…

…I will find my peace in the worst of situations…

…Can you relate to this?…

Dayvlight

…Beatlemania Pt.1…

…Did I ever mention that I am a Beatles fan? I am also a great admirer of John Lennon’s life and works!…

…Ok I love George, Paul and Ringo too. I mean what is a band without the rest of its members? George inspired me to play my first guitar solo, Paul showed me how to sing from the heart and Ringo taught me the art of joke cracking!…

…The entire Beatles love affair started during my NS days. So here are some pics of what I have collected so far over the years…

...Beatle Albums!...

...Compilation Albums...

...All things Lennon...

...How about some visual?...

…End of Part 1…

…to be continued…

Dayvlight

…A Reflection: “True Strength Lies Within A Still Mind”…

…A very well-respected teacher of mine, Mr Piya Tan, wrote the above statement to me in an email this morning. Although the words look very simple individually, but they bring about great depth and wisdom when we read them together as a sentence…

…I just can’t help myself from reflecting on those words. How about you?…

…The society that we live in today can be described as one that is “fast-paced, stressful and people are always trying to find something to do”. Yes, get that? We are always trying to find something to do. The other day I was telling some friends that in a “modern society” like Singapore, people often feel weird NOT to be doing anything. It seems as if having rest and being calm is abnormal…

…If we were to stop what we are doing now and just close our eyes for a moment, what do we see? How do we feel? Can we just be still for 5minutes and not fidget? My guess is that for most of us (myself included), we will often feel this act of “being still and not letting your mind wander” is something unnatural. But do not worry, it is not…

…Try it: Time yourself to see how long can you actually sit still with your eyes closed and try not to let your mind wander. You will be surprised to notice how busy your mind is! From thoughts ranging from the past, to the present and to the future. From worries to what-have-you-nots. From happiness to sadness. The list goes on…

…And we ask ourselves, “are we really in-charge of our minds?”…

…When we make decisions, do we really make them based on our fresh impressions of the subject matter or not ? When we meet people for the first time, just how quick are we to “pigeon-hole” them in the various “people” categories in our lives? With all that misc info that we had gathered along the way through our conversations with various people, media, past experiences, etc, are we ever really making any REAL decisions then? One that is straight from the heart, non-biased and fair for all?…

… True strength lies within a still mind. A still mind is one that is clear. A still mind is one that has right views and understanding. A still mind has wisdom…

…True strength lies not in big muscles or big guns, but rather, in the intentions and choices that we make…

…With that, I will leave you with 2 things to think about:…

…When we call somebody a “bad person” , think again. Do we mean to say that this person has never done a single good since birth? How do we know?  Hence, the proper sentence should be, “he or she has done something that is bad”. We should not condemn the person, but rather the action…

…Count how many times in a day are we really affected by the things around us? Note how easy it is for us to be led by our minds to enter a chain of events/emotions that will affect our lives. A good example will be noise. We may wish to ask ourselves, “is this noise really disturbing me, or am I simply disturbing it?”…

…When we can truly learn how to use our minds more efficiently and effectively, then we will discover that the ultimate source of strength for us is not too far away…

Dayvlight

For more info on Mr Piya Tan and the stuffs that he writes, kindly visit:

http://sites.google.com/site/dharmafarer2/

…Observation: Why do food at the local hawker centre taste differently despite having the same supplier?…

…The other day while I was having my lunch at a nearby hawker centre, I observed that there was this delivery guy that sends his goods to the different hawker stalls located there. Be it sauces, oil, canned food etc, they all are being provided by the same supplier…

…Through this simple observation, I realised that the art of cooking lies not in what you use, but rather, the skill and creativity that you put into making it happen. Just like music or art, if we were to provide a skilled musician or painter lousy tools, he or she will still be able to conjure beautiful images or soothing music out of it. But if we hand these same tools over to someone else less-skilled, he or she may not produce the desired results. Having said that, it is good to note that having great gear or equipment doesn’t guarantee success too!…

…So the next time when we eat out at our local hawker, we should remind ourselves of the effort and creativity the cooks use in their cooking. Sure, there may be instances whereby the food taste horrible, but hey, who can we blame? At least these “cooks” are trying. Besides, if they can still be opened for business, I’m sure there are people out there who appreciate their cooking…

…To cultivate great skill means one has to endure hours of hard work and learn to live through countless disappointments…

…How much effort have YOU put in for yours?…

Dayvlight

…Why Blog?…

…Here’s a short introduction to…:

1) …Why “A Day(v) In The Life”?…
…”A Day In The Life” is the title of a very well-known Beatles song (I’m a big Beatles fan). This song debuted on The Beatles’ “Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band” album back then in 1967 and is still considered today as one of the greatest songs ever to be written. Since the word “day” sounds like the shorter version of my name (as in dayv), I decided to blend the two and bring across the idea of telling readers that this blog is about  “a day in the life of me”…

Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band

2) …Why “Dayvlight”?…

…Due to the intention of this blog, I realised that “daylight” (another play of words with my name) symbolises “a new beginning” or “hope”. With that, I hope readers here will be reminded that everyday is a new chapter in life and we must always be ready to accept it and enjoy the present moment…

Took this shot in Nepal, 2007

3) …What’s with the “… *insert word(s)* …” format that I use?…

…The “…” “…” symbolises my constantly active mind…

The Mind

…and…

…Why did I decide to blog???…

…Many thoughts, many ideas and many comments. But all worthless if not shared with a community of many…

…Therefore…

…I will try to update this blog as often as possible and hopefully it will live up to serve its purpose…

…Stay tuned…

Dayvlight

…all comments/suggestions are welcomed to make this blog a nicer place…